Abundance or scarcity – Does money grow on trees?
What kind of life do you envision for your children? I bet you wish happiness and love for them, but what else? What kind of experiences do you see in their future? Will they become “successful” in something, what does successful look like? What about financial abundance, is that something you hope for?
Set your definition of successful
Before I continue writing this post I’d like to stop and make something very clear. I do not equate success with having a lot of money. Some people give me a special look when I talk about finances as if I’m going on about something that shouldn’t be talked about. Some have even asked me if I’m not afraid of putting too much pressure on my kids in terms of making a lot of money.
I don’t pressure my children into becoming financially free or some definition of “successful” that has a financial number tied to it.
I do, however, encourage them into learning about money and finances so that they can make informed decisions. Money is important, not because of image, but because of what it provides; some level of security and a world of possibilities. Money is a tool and when you know how to use it you can choose if and when you want to.
I do not equate success with having a lot of money. Neither do I equate success to being poor and struggling to pay your bills.
I want my children to focus on what makes them feel alive, on what makes them proud of themselves and how they can bring value to others. I believe that achieving success in life, according to that definition, combined with financial literacy will bring that financial abundance that all well-meaning people deserve.
So, when you envision the future for your children do you see financial abundance? What are your thoughts about money and abundance? Try asking your children the same questions and see if you can detect their relationship and view on this subject.
Does having money make you popular?
We’ve reasoned about money in our family. I’ve asked if they thought money was important, could money make you popular and are you a better friend if you have loads of money? They’re not easy questions to answer since they’re not binary questions.
Reasoning about money, and what having money means, is important. It helps children to become aware of this tool and their own thoughts and beliefs about it. Maybe your kids, like mine when they were younger, think that being able to buy things for their friends will make their friends like them more. I’m not saying that that is incorrect, maybe their friends love presents, I know I do, I’m just saying it’s a good thing to talk about. Does that popularity come with any downsides? How would they feel towards a friend that gave them gifts?
Astrid Lindgren, Swedish author of children books, writes about Pippi Longstocking who is super rich. She’s got a bag full of gold and she spends a lot of it on her friends – one particular episode fascinated my girls, the same way it caught my imagination when I was young, The visit to the candy shop. Pippi goes in and buys bags and bags of candy – she pretty much empties the store – and shares it with all the children in town. Needless to say Pippi is very popular amongst the kids in this episode.
The questions aren’t binary. The answers depends on how the actions make you feel. Is your relationship impacted in any bad way due to negative feelings on either part? If everyone involved are happy then everything is good!
Then the questions level up to;
- Are there different ways to give?
- How can you facilitate a completely positive response from the receiver?
Does money grow in trees?
Apart from the idea of what money can or cannot make you into, I’ve identified a number of other important concepts to introduce to my kids. One base concept is the mindset of abundance versus scarcity.
If you believe that money is abundant in the world you are more likely share it, fight for it and to use it. If you believe that there is loads and loads of money available, just waiting for you to go out and get it, you will be more likely to do just that.
We’ve talked about money growing on trees to make abundance into a visual idea.
“There is so much money in in the world that you could replace all leaves on all trees on the entire planet and that would still only be part of everything there is. Most of it is just waiting for you to claim it. You just have to show up and climb the trees and start picking!”
Showing up and climbing trees becomes metaphors for earning money – let’s look into that later. For now let’s stay with the concept of abundance.
Abundance versus scarcity
If you believe that money is abundant you will consider it to be relatively easy to get. If there is so much of it, why shouldn’t you be able to get some or even a lot? No more thoughts like; “it’s too complicated, only geniuses can do it” or “why would I succeed when there are so many smart hardworking people out there that have already thought of everything?”.
With an abundance mindset you believe that there is enough money on this planet, that if you can just find the right tree and are willing to do some climbing, you will be able to bring in a harvest that will set you up for life.
If you believe that there is money in abundance you will also be more willing to invest the money you have. This is a core prerequisite for making money grow. Yes, there is a risk to investing, but since you always can just go out and get more you’re more willing to look at that risk.
If you believe that it’s a scarce resource – you will start acting constricted towards it. You will start to pay more attention to securing what you’ve got than in how to invest it into growth or in how to use it for loving and giving purposes.
Some people agree on the abundance theory but think that any one individual shouldn’t focus on getting too much of it. “Then there won’t be enough for everyone.” Like if someone takes a too big piece of the pie there won’t be enough left for everyone else. But hey, what if there are infinite pies and pastries out there just waiting for someone to find them and deliver them to those who are hungry?
Be happy for people who are climbing and harvesting
An abundance mindset will let you feel true joy and gratitude towards people that have earned a lot of money. You will believe that these people have shown you where there are trees to climb and they will be an inspiration and a reminder of what is possible.
I think that money will make you more of what you already are. If you are greedy and selfish you will still be that way even if you win the lottery. If you are a giving person, and someone who loves to surprise people, you’ll use your abundance for doing good things for others. Having money doesn’t make you popular, at least not with the people that matters, it’s who you are and what you do that will make you loved and appreciated.
Good people should have as much money as possible. Because good people will do good things with that tool.
Some tips to help along the way to an abundance mindset:
- Stop saying that things are ”too expensive”. Those words are sending the subconscious signal to yourself and your children that you don’t have enough money. Replace it with the phrase “I don’t think it’s worth that amount”. This way you shift from the feeling of scarcity into a more constructive discussion about value.
- An abundance mindset is not equal to ignoring risk. Please do your due diligence and your risk-reward ratio calculations before doing any investing. (And if you don’t know those terms google them 🙂 )
- Helping others makes you feel alive and proud of yourself. It’s a great way to show yourself how good the abundance mindset can feel. Use it to create a good spiral of abundance and giving.
